I can’t begin to count how many times I’ve made up excuses and waited for the ‘perfect moment’ to do something. In fact, I’d be here all day (and probably the rest of the week), if I listed off every single time I was guilty of holding myself back from going after what I wanted.
The problem is that through our whole childhoods, we have always been told we need permission to do the things we want; pestering our parents/ guardian to sign the letter to go on that very exciting school trip and even asking the teacher if we can go to the toilet. It becomes a very strong lesson that is subconsciously brought into adulthood.
We are all waiting for someone to sign our permission slips and tell us that we are allowed to pursue what we desire…
I won’t start dating until I’ve lost ten pounds… Permission.
I’ll start that business idea after I have more support… Permission.
I’ll join that yoga club after I’ve learnt about it all first… Permission.
I won’t reach out to that company I’ve dreamed of working for my whole life until I’ve had another five years of experience… Permission.
Any of this sound remotely familiar? It’s all just ludicrous permission slips that we have convinced ourselves must be followed. They’re completely detrimental, for these permission slips are simply excuses twisted into something familiar from our childhoods. The only outcome of a permission slip is a life of regret from never taking risks and finding the courage to chase your dreams.
What you need to do is rip up every permission slip this instant. Only then will you be liberated of all those excuses and be free to follow your heart in order to become something great.
I recently ripped up my own permission slips. I had wanted to set up my own business and try and sell my own designs after graduating but repeatedly told myself that it couldn’t happen because I had no connections and minimal experience in the industry. Despite this, I chose to pursue my dream after coming to the solid realisation that if I didn’t at least try, I’ll always ask myself ‘what if?’ and to me this is far scarier than putting myself out there and failing.
It’s certainly not been easy. I’ve sat in a fair for 18 hours and not sold a single thing and felt like giving up, yet also sold off my first design at an expensive price and thus, established my first customer. This led to opening up my own shop!
On a smaller note, I was waiting for permission to reach out to more brands for The Whimsical Wildling. I told myself I needed more followers before I could contact the companies I aspired to work with. Ironically, I received positive feedback that I never expected, the moment I stopped the excuses and actually sent out my emails. In fact, this very shoot would not even exist if I hadn’t contacted Joanie Clothing.
Of course, it can be very daunting and scary to go after your dreams, for it is the fear of failure that can be overwhelmingly disheartening. However, sitting and waiting for things to happen is a guarantee to stay immobile.
The ones who accomplish the most, live with few regrets and achieve success are the people that ripped up all of those self-destructive permission slips and just went out and did it. Regardless of feeling like they weren’t ready or the perfect moment wasn’t there yet. They understood that no timing is perfect.
We may place blame, give reasons, and even have excuses; but in the end, it is an act of cowardice to not follow your dreams.
~ Steve Maraboli
How do you rip up the permission slip?
All of this can seem easier said than done and whilst this may be partially true, if you make a commitment to yourself, you will find that this is entirely possible. Most importantly, that your quality of life will increase and you will live with the satisfaction that you are more than able to reach your goals.
Face your Fears.
Fight the negative thoughts, either from the voices in your head or the ones that surround you. Listening will only hold you back. Only you know what you are capable of to shine at your brightest. It’s important to take time out everyday to fight your demons and I’ve found the most effective way to do this is simply jump in head first and prove to yourself that you are not controlled by your fears. It is only when you believe in yourself, you can go for the gold and rip up all your permission slips.
Shift your mindset.
Victimisation is arguably the most self-destructive mindsets anyone can have. It prevents you from self-reflecting and creates an egotistical personality . Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you. You have to look inside of yourself and create the mental shift and stop feeling sorry for yourself because your dreams haven’t happened. Take responsibility for your situation and if you’re unhappy, ask yourself why and what you can do to change this.
Make a plan of action.
The worst thing you can do is think about everything you need to do to get where you wish to be. You’ll start freezing up, overwhelmed by the challenge that lies ahead. Instead of trying to tackle everything on, make a list and work through each bullet point- step by step. Remember that doing nothing is worse than acting on something and failing. Even if your actions don’t go to plan, they’re still pushing you forward, despite feeling like the complete opposite. Don’t live your life always looking back, regretfully.
The most important thing to remember through your journey, is that set backs only launch you into something better, there is a lesson with every downfall and the universe is simply giving you the tools to become better than who you were yesterday. You can’t get to your final destination on the first stop but it is your first step and that’s more than most people are taking.
What incredible things could you do if you set fire to all of your permission slips and let them burn?
Skirt: Diamante Button Skirt
Tights: Lace Mesh Tights